The path that leads you home
by victoria vla
Summary: Mulder and Scully find what's really worth in life, and they will gain more than they expected. On their old-new journey they will meet someone really special.
1. Starting somewhere

_**Note:**_ English is not my first language and also I am new to sharing fics, so I know there are greater fics out there, but if you hang around I believe that I'll improve. I am sorry for the pace that I am going to upload chapters as life keeps me busy and it takes me a lot of time to be at least half satisfied with what I write.

It's been one hell of a case. The silliness of the story that hail from the overly exaggerative imagination of the Guy Mann, just gave him a headache. But now that it is all over, despite the gibberish story, there are words of the were-lizard man that stuck with him.

 _"Because if there's nothing more to life than what we already know, then there's nothing but worries, self-doubt, regret and loneliness."_

At some point he had felt useless and so his obsession deepened and he fell into depression. He didn't even know when or how it had happened.

He had started worrying.

About the world, the future that's coming, the conspiracies, global warming, crop circles, ufo's. He was looking for life in some other planet, while life on this one was still moving forward without him.

He didn't believe in anything, he was doubting everything, and he himself, became a victim of self-doubt.

And for what? The only feelings left in him was regret and loneliness. At the beginning he was bitter that she left him, but then he realized that she didn't just leave him but her attempts at helping him were futile. He wasn't letting her. And he regretted it now.

And loneliness. What is loneliness? If he has to define it he'll say: Existing, but not living.

Mulder grabs his phone and calls her. He needed to hear her voice, to feel something, anything. Finally she picks up.

"Mulder, what's going on?"

"Hey Scully, is it a bad time," he doesn't like that he has no idea what she's doing. They use to do stuff together, and now she's in some apartment, alone. Or is she? He starts to sweats.

"No, no. I'm just reading a book. Is everything okay?" She wonders why he called her at 11pm. And gets just a little bit worried.

"Oh everything's fine," he thinks he fooled her, "Are you alone?" He did not mean for that to come out. He is not sure why he said it.

"Wha-"

"I'm sorry Scully, I do not know where that came from," he interrupts, "I didn't meant to say that, and it is non of my business."

"What is bothering you Mulder?" She asked gently. Clearly he called with a reason, and she'll figure it out.

"Scully-nothing. I don't why I called, I'll go n-?"

"Don't hang up!" She literally screamed at her phone, " Mulder?"

"Yeah?" His voice sounding small.

"Why did you call me, Mulder?" The ache she is feeling at not being able to just be right there with him, soothing his worries aside was slowly killing her.

He decided that he'll be bold, there is literally nothing he can lose. "I am lonely, Scully," but when the first words came out of his mouth, he thinks that maybe he should shut up. But instead he keeps on going, "I screwed up, I screwed up everything in my life. But I don't really care about that, the thing is..."

His voice just trails of, he can hear her breathing but she's not saying anything.

She's not sure that they should have this conversation over the phone, she believes they are ready for this conversation, they should both be present and on a clear head.

"I regret taking you for granted, for not showing you what you mean to me, how much I appreciate you," he is on the verge of tears and I don't know what brought this on.

"Mulder-" she means to calm him down but, apparently, he has something more to say.

"I know what you may be thinking, but I am okay, really. I am trying to get better, for you..Scully. Do you think I am getting better?" he sounds so fragile.

"Mulder, yes, you are, indeed getting better. I can notice and I believe in you, I believe that you can do whatever you put your mind to. I know you, Mulder," she is desperately trying to assure him, and the best thing of all is that it's true.

"I love you, Scully," after a beat, " do you still love me?"

It breaks her her to think that maybe even for a fleeting second he thought that she doesn't love him.

"I have never stopped loving you, Mulder," _please believe me_ , is what she thought. "Do you want me to come over?," it isn't really a question, so she doesn't wait for an answer when she says, "I am coming over."

Beta read by fanfiction4thewin on Tumblr.


	2. Embrace my feelings

**_Note:_** I know it's been a long time and I am sorry. Life has been keeping me busy. I am sorry again for grammar, spelling, punctuating or whatever kind of a mistakes it may has since I don't have a beta. I hope you'll enjoy it anyway.

On the way to the house, her mind had been racing faster than her car. The months apart had been an emotional roller coaster for both. Scully had thrown herself in her job in order not to think about the disaster that her life had become, Mulder's bad habits of insomnia had made its appearance again. Thinking of all the times that he'd fail in life, avoiding to admin the undeniable truth, that this is one of those times. At least in his self-blaming mind. Moreover, that only leads them to sleepless nights and going on day after day, after week, after moths on two to three cups of caffeine.

Steering the car into the narrow road toward the house, she willed her mind to shut up. She got out of her car and saw that he had left the light on the porch for her. The door was unlocked and as she made her way into the house, her eyes caught purest sight of the beautiful man, lying on the couch. His hands, as if he'd been praying, were cushioned between the couch and his cheek. His full lips slightly open, his breath coming out in little puffs. His black t-shirt had rolled up a little bit, showing his belly button and firm abdominal muscles. Apparently, life has caught up with him and he'd given in. She was happy to see him resting, looking at him, lying there like that she'd completely forgotten about the conversation they were suppose to have, the main reason for her being in the house at that ungodly hour.

Whit every passing minute, accompanied by the ticking of the old clock on the wall she felt heavier, and heavier. Her body was begging her to get the much-needed rest. For all those nights, laying and thinking about everything or just unable to fall asleep were weakening her system and just now she realize how tired she actually was. The pull was stronger than her resolve and the next thing she knew, she was snuggled against his warm body, and her head tucked under his chin, her arms between their bodies and his instinctively coming around her and lying on its spot, at the small of her back.

Mulder's eyes fluttered and it took him a couple of seconds to get out of the fog. He must have fallen asleep while waiting for Scully. A familiar sensation and a famine scent invaded his consciousness. He can tell her smell apart in a crowd of thousands of people and the distinct shape of her body, which melts so perfectly against his own. He relished the feel of her, the warm that was coming off of waves from her body, the puff of breaths gently hitting his clothes chest and the soft skin of her back against his hand that he must have stuck under her shirt while they were floating through the peaceful darkness, for the first time in a really long time.

Reluctantly he took his hand off her back and tried to lift himself above her and off the couch without waking her. Unfortunaly she had always been a light sleeper and the slightest of movement woke her up. Her eyes moved beneath her eyelids seconds before a crystal blue met hazel. He can sink in the puddles of her eyes.

''You okay, Mulder?'' Her voice thick with sleep and her eyes not quite open yet, disheveled hair. She was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen.

''I need to take a wee, Scully,'' he said a little sheepishly.

She smiles a little as she moved aside to let him get up and do his business.  
When he returned he found he in the kitchen. At first, he thought that she was making them café, but she wasn't moving and her head was down. He approached her from behind and looked from over her shoulder. What he saw made his heart clench in his chest.

There it was. A photograph of their child, bathed by his mother's tears.

He squeezed her hips and dropped his head on her shoulder. Their precious son that had to be given away in hope to have a chance in life. A son that is a miracle, a miracle his mother had been denying exist her whole life. A miracle to a woman with chance in motherhood made by heartless men. A son to a father who never though his center in life can resolve around a tine family. A family that fills his heart and warms his soul.

''Mulder..,'' lost in his own thoughts, he almost missed her broken whisper.

He hugged tight and lowered his voice to match hers as to not break the spell, ''I know, I miss him too.'' That's the first time that he willingly open a conversation about their lost gone child. It's not like he didn't want to talk about their son, he'd always been on their mind. On all the holidays, meaningful dates, mother and father's day and his own birthday. With every beginning of a new day, they'll feel the lost, with every family dinner, the empty chair tugged at their hearts. But most important is that, Mulder always felt like he has to be Scully's rock when she crumble almost in pain from the thought of the little boy she wishes to hold every day. And Mulder feared that he can't do that, he can't hold her up when his footing is off.


	3. I am not arguing with you

They have talked until the sun came up, made some food, shed a lot of tears, both of them.

''Enough about what it was, the past is in the past and no one is able to change it,'' Scully said. They were cuddled in front of the fireplace that still gave of light and warmth, since the air outside was still chilly.

''Wrong, Scully. John Titor claimed to be a soldier from 2036, a part of a government time travel program out of Florida.''

''Is that what you do with your free time, Mulder?'' she was trying to suppress a smile for his sake."Though, he had come from the future and not gone back in time."

''Scully, here is back in time for him. He lives in the future so for him the present, as we know it, is the past," he said it in in a matter-of-fact manner.

''I am not gonna argue with you."

''Awe, but I love it when you do that," Mulder pouted.

''Maybe we can take a rainchek," she said through a yawn.

The conversation had left them feeling drained again, but the difference is that this time they felt.  
They felt the pain, lose and emptiness. Then they grieve together. They let the sadness, regrets and tears out. And they there was acceptance.

''When I came here the purpose of our conversation was different, but our relationship had never stood on unstable ground. All along the house of cards had been the subjects we've avoid and the things we've never said.'' With that she got up, stretched while little another yawn out. She turned to Mulder again, who was watching her with rapt fascination and asked, ''Mind if I go catch some z's? This was one really long night?''

''Of course I don't mind, Scully" he smiled at her.

''Do you want to come with me?" the question was not shy, it was just to let him know that it was okay to go to her whenever he needs to.

The both slept way after noon, nestled together. Right where they belonged.


End file.
